Elozonam: “Performing Oral Sex or Helping a Woman Doesn’t Make You Less Masculine”

Former Big Brother Naija housemate and Nollywood actor, Elozonam Ogbolu, has addressed toxic masculinity and common myths surrounding masculinity in a revealing podcast discussion.

In a recent episode of the In The Company Of Men podcast hosted by Ikhane Akhigbe, Elozonam challenged the outdated perception that tasks such as cooking, grocery shopping, or giving oral sex to a woman are unmanly. He insisted that these actions do not diminish a man’s masculinity.

He encouraged men to develop empathy, adaptability, and emotional intelligence when dealing with their partners and the women in their lives.

“When it comes to specific tasks—especially those many men typically avoid—I think it highlights toxic masculinity,” Elozonam stated. “There are guys who genuinely believe that pleasuring a woman orally is not manly. It’s strange. Serving a woman, helping her out, running errands like buying groceries—many rigidly masculine men in Nigeria don’t consider that to be manly behavior.”

He further explained with examples:
“If your wife asks you to buy sanitary pads, some men would feel deeply uncomfortable with that. But why? Why can’t you help your partner, your mother, or your wife by buying a sanitary pad? Why can’t you cook for her? Why does doing what’s traditionally seen as ‘women’s duties’ make you feel any less masculine? It doesn’t.”

Elozonam also touched on how toxic masculinity is sometimes perpetuated by women who associate toxicity with love.

He noted, “Toxic masculinity is often reinforced by the opposite gender. Some men grow up watching toxic behaviors modeled by their fathers, and they carry that into adulthood. Then they meet women who expect the same toxicity. These women often see it as a sign of love or strength. To them, if you’re not toxic, you don’t care enough.”

He added that some women even romanticize abusive behaviors.
“I’ve seen posts online where women say things like, ‘If he doesn’t beat you, he doesn’t love you.’ How? Why should abuse ever be a measure of affection?”